Banter: Eating Like Clockwork

Her:  I love time. It makes me happy – very happy.  I am a planner and the clock is an essential tool for the perfect plan! Why go to sleep?  Because it’s time!  Why wake up?  Because it’s time!  Troy is more into going with the flow.  Eat when you’re hungry, sleep when you’re tired - All that crazy stuff.  Here is a typical weekend encounter between Troy and I regarding plans to eat: 

Her:  Its 12:00, time to make lunch. 

Him: Didn’t we just eat breakfast at 10:30? I won’t be hungry for awhile.

Her:  Um ok . . . but it’s noon and since we eat lunch at 12:30 I better get started.  Plus, if we don’t eat now it will mess up dinner.

Him: And . . .

Her:  Well you see, the kids’ bedtime is 8:30 and they need about 30 minutes to get ready for bed so that’s 8:00. If we want an hour of family time then that’s 7:00. Clean up from dinner takes 30 minutes so that’s 6:30 and dinner takes about 30 minutes to eat so it should be served at 6:00.  You can clearly see why lunch must be served on schedule.

Him: It sounds like you overslept…

Rules: To Be Followed or Broken?

Her: I love to follow the rules. From street signs, little signs on buildings, teachers in school, any rule I am on it. Why drive 65? Because the sign says. Rules like no parking, no food or drink, stay on the path, do not remove tag. Yes, I've been known to sneak snacks in a movie theater and drive over the speed limit once in a while but generally if there is a rule I follow it!

Him: Rules are more guidelines than requirements. You have to look at the intent. When a sign says, "No Running in the Hall" what it really means is- no falling and breaking yourself only to come back and sue us. So, of course, I run in halls- with or without the sign- but I don't turn around and sue someone because I'm a klutz (which I'm certainly not, of course). And don't get me started on monopolies like movie theaters that rip me off because they can. Seriously, an $8 soda? What, is it laced with cocaine? That soda cost them all of twenty cents and they think it's cool to make 4000% profit on it. Why do I sneak in snacks? Because I can.

Her: But the rule says no. Not if you feel like it or maybe. It's pretty definitive don't you think? And what if you get caught? Isn't that just the worst feeling? Everyone will know you were naughty!

Him: What feeling? Naughty? You lost me! I get feelings… feelings like, why do I have to stop at this light, it's 2:00AM and there's not a car on the road, red light, really?!?! Or…I don't need some 15 year old life guard telling me I can't dive into six feet of water, I've been doing it for years, haven't hit my head yet.

Her: Ouch! My head is hurting just at the thought!

Him: I guess I must concede; there are a few rules that have merit… a few that actually bear logic. They all start the same…Thou shalt not…

Planning vs. Spontaneity

Anyone who knows Troy and I well knows that we love to banter. It's our way of laughing off our differences - annoying to some but hilarious to us.  Here's a little taste . . .


Him: I love to get up on a Saturday morning before my wife and kids, sometimes before the sun, and put in a few miles while the rest of the world is asleep. By the time I get home my family is usually awake and about their business – breakfast in p.j.'s, the three year-old is brushing up on her Spanish with Dora, the oldest three are building a fort out of blankets in the living room and the baby is back and forth checking up on everybody like she owns the place. This is all music to my ears. All I need is a quick shower, breakfast on the back patio with my wife, and I'm ready to pack the car and get out for the day. We've got great hiking all around us as near as a couple blocks away, the beach is about a 30 minute drive, and both Santa Barbara and LA are within an hour. Time to be spontaneous and get away for the day.