Quiver Full

Him: So we’ve got a grip of kids. And let me tell you that out of the gate, this was not what I had in mind. If you would have asked me before having kids how many I wanted, I would have responded with two… maybe three, but five was never even a consideration. I think I looked at kids like most people do. I saw having children as a season that was part of every married couple’s life. I thought of playing with my kids in the yard, teaching them to ride a bike and taking them to my favorite childhood places. But never did I think of them as work. There was never the thought that they would interfere with what I had going on. In fact, the very idea of only having two (maybe three) was probably my own selfishness- not wanting to base every decision on what was best for my family. For example, vacationing in one hotel room doesn’t work with seven, vehicle options have been whittled down to minivan or giant SUV, we don’t fly anywhere, it only takes one breakfast to destroy a box of cereal, new shoes for all of us can easily cost over $500 (which will inevitably soar as they get older), the absolute cheapest we can eat out is Taco Bell for around $22 (a modest restaurant with soft drinks and an appetizer comes to around $50 after tip), any interest (gym, running, reading, etc.) that I have consumes the time when my kids are asleep- usually before sunup. Then there are all the teaching moments (which I definitely enjoy but they take time), hobbies that I just don’t have time for, vacations that are nowhere near the budget, toys that need to be fixed, fights to be broken up, spills to be cleaned… the list goes on.

But after having one, three was no longer a maybe. And although I’d like to say that I was open to it right away, over time God changed my heart to the idea of more. I understood and appreciated the wisdom of Psalm 127:3-5. My quiver was coming into focus as He dealt with my selfishness. No longer was the perfect little suburban American lifestyle going to be my reality. Now don’t get me wrong, I am very much an American and I happen to live in the suburbs, but much of the cultural norm around me has been fading as God reveals more of His wisdom and plan for my life.

The more I hear statistics about divorce rates and families having fewer and fewer children I become bothered by the realization that these norms are creeping into the church. Couples are deciding for themselves the number of children they want without even consulting their creator. They are looking first, as I once did, at how their worldly lifestyle and personal comfort would be affected by more children.  Typically, such decisions are justified by, “we can give our children a better life if we only have a few” or “we can only afford college tuition for two” or “we don’t have enough patience for that”. We must be asking Christ to lead us in our decision making and understand that every excuse we make is driven by selfishness. I recently read the following statement by Al Mohler, “Christians must recognize that this rebellion against parenthood represents nothing less than an absolute revolt against God’s design.” Sound harsh? The truth sometimes is.

We know the greatest commandment to “Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul” but we seem to interpret that to exclude all your lifestyle. That commandment was not delivered with exceptions- except when your finances may be affected or as long as you’re able to maintain your Saturday morning golf ritual… except when it cramps your style. Serving Christ by being obedient to fill your quiver is not about income or convenience.  Does this mean everyone is called to have a pile of kids? Maybe not, but I encourage you to seek God’s direction in this area with a soft heart ready to hear his voice while putting your personal agenda aside.

For now, we’re very happy with five… very busy… very tired, but very happy. For now, we’re right where we feel God telling us to be. But if God’s plan is to continue blessing us, who are we to rebel?

Courage

Her: With a new blog and business, I have been overwhelmed with “putting myself out there”.  For my business I have gone into peoples’ most personal spaces in their homes to organize.  I have helped with DIY projects, sewing projects, garage sales, parties and I just never know how my assistance is being received.  I’ve been complimented and they have called me back for more work which are great signs but it is all a little nerve racking to say the least.  The blog just adds an even bigger wave of fear.  Here I am putting my thoughts and feelings out there for the world to judge.  All the nervousness will build up in a moment of panic and then God reminds me, “I called you to this”.  I don’t know where this blog will lead, if anywhere, I don’t know how my business will grow, if at all.  All I can trust is that I am on this journey with God.

“Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the Lord your God goes with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you.”

Deuteronomy 31:6

^“For the Spirit God gave us does not make us timid, but gives us power, love and self-discipline.”

2 Timothy 1:7

As God calls us to new, amazing and sometimes nerve racking things we have to remember WHO has called us.  I can look back on other big moments in my life.  Moving (7 times in the 12 years of being married), having each baby, homeschooling.  God has been there. He has seen me through.  He has moved in ways I could have never imagined and the place I am at now was well worth the struggle. We need to find our strength in Him even when we cannot see the path ahead.

            “Be on your guard; stand firm in the faith; be courageous; be strong.”

1 Corinthians 16:13

Worry tries to sneak in and destroy what He has called us to do.  If we give in to that worry we will be miserable and ineffective for Him.  I love these next two scriptures.  They are from the same conversation from two different books of the Bible.  Two perspectives on the same

 words.

^“Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.”

Matthew 6:34 (For more on this read 6:24-34)

^“Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to your life? Since you cannot do this very little thing, why do you worry about the rest?”

Luke 12:25-26

I love how Jesus calls adding a single hour to your life a very little thing.

 

“I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.”

John 16:33

God is walking with us.  He is in control.  Have courage to walk the path you are called. Thank you all for journeying with me.  I can’t wait to see what God has in store for each of us!

Monday . . . it's here again.

Her: Another Monday begins . . . whiny baby, demanding three year old and no milk for cereal.  Not even a tiny little drop for my coffee.  Laundry is piling up even though I tackled it all weekend and I’ve got a major camping trip to pack and grocery shop for. Even as I type this sentence I have a baby wanting up on the bed, a 7 year old waiting to tattle on her sister and a 6 year old that I’m not quite sure what she wants yet. . . 

Ok, I’m back. Many times I walk my house in the morning and repeat the words, “don’t panic” over and over again in my head.  Sometimes I hide in my room for an extra 30 minutes in the morning hoping everything will be done before I get out there (Yeah, right!)  Other days I come out like a whirlwind demanding that everyone obey and clean, NOW! Neither of which are really successful for anyone.  

As mommies our responsibilities are endless, our days are short, and the little people that we are doing the work for are not exactly cooperative.  More like tornadoes to say the least. And yet the days come over and over whether we like it or not. And the more we procrastinate the more it piles but tackling the monotony of responsibility is sometimes just as bad as ignoring it. 

But, guess what? Yet again, there is hope in the truth of the word.  Yesterday we heard an amazing sermon at church on God’s gifts to us in Romans 5:1-11 one of which is joy.  Joy only found in the Lord. I felt like God was encouraging me to walk with Him – trusting Him with my life, to walk in Him –trusting His holy spirit to guide me, and to walk for Him – for His glory.

Through that vantage point laundry, cleaning, or getting anything done really is secondary to our true purpose which is God and our relationship with Him.  I will leave you with the following scripture to encourage you as you start your week:

“And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through Him.”

Colossians 3:17

Adorable Interruption

Her:  If you know me at all you know that I am always going.  And going.  And going.  And going. And I love every minute of it.  This is why I can home school, raise five kids, blog and start a new business all at the same time.  This is the way God made me and it serves me well.  But what I am not good at is stopping to smell the roses.  How would I do that?  I am always zooming by at 100 miles an hour.  I don’t even see the roses! Troy is amazing at this and I have found myself learning from his example over the years.  I am beginning to appreciate the journey more and more, not just the finished product.

The change has been slow and sometimes painful.  I have to make a conscious effort to do this and many days my flesh gets in the way.  I just want to get SOMETHING done.  I am tortured by the call of things unfinished and find life’s interruptions inconvenient to say the least.  But I have made progress!  I can see it with my kiddos: letting them finish their stuttering sentences, watching them play, interacting with them more.  This has been a struggle for me, a learned art. 

There is nothing wrong with being a doer.  Today I got up at 7:30 a.m. and accomplished the following:  got ready for the day, read my blog devotions, helped my oldest make eggs, loaded the dishwasher, started, finished, folded and put away a load of laundry, got my youngest ready for the day, received two phone calls, ate breakfast (This was a feat all of its own.  I had to reheat my breakfast burrito 3x!), all while babysitting my younger two, homeschooling the older three and correcting behavior frequently (with five there is always someone needing guidance). Now it was time to start blogging.  I sat down in front of my computer at 9:45 a.m. when my hubby dropped by unannounced.  I am usually fully annoyed by such interruption but today I just enjoyed him.  He left and I was back to work.  10:05 a.m. I was heading back to the computer when this crawled into my lap:

 And her dolly . . .

And now her dolly in her shoe . . .

  Now dolly is dancing on my computer.

 And I loved every minute of it.

I am finding so much joy in my new found peace. A little more Mary and a little less Martha. 

Luke 10:38-42 :)

Parenting: Part II - Grace

Her:  I have been overwhelmed trying to write this blog.  The topic of grace is something that I have been learning and growing in for the past few years and I still can’t say that I have completely wrapped my head around the concept.  But, I will share what God has taught me so far. 

Years ago I let go of the world to walk with the Lord.  I let go of being good enough, wise enough, together enough in the world’s eyes.  To some I am still a messy flake to others a neurotic control freak.  You can’t please everyone- it’s too much effort and completely exhausting.

Unfortunately, I transferred my effort into making God happy.  My goal was to be good enough, wise enough and together enough for God. Perfect mom, perfect wife, perfect disciple.  What a complete waste of my efforts because it turns out I am already enough!  I am God’s child and he loves me unconditionally.  I don’t have to do or be anything. He already died on the cross and has given me his grace.

I read this scripture today that solidified this truth to me.   I’ve heard it a million times but it completed rocked my world:

Trust in the Lord with all your heart,
    and do not lean on your own understanding.
In all your ways acknowledge him,
    and he will make straight your paths.
Proverbs 3:5-6

So, I just have to love him and trust him and he’s got the rest handled.  WOW! And this next scripture blew me away even more:

“However, I consider my life worth nothing to me; my only aim is to finish the race and complete the task the Lord Jesus has given me - the task of testifying to the good news of God’s grace.”

Acts 20:24

We get to rest in the Lord Jesus and tell others the good news.  Well, I am in! No need to try and be perfect anymore.  YAY!

How, you may ask, does this apply to your parenting? Here is an excerpt from an amazing book I am reading called Give Them Grace: Dazzling Your Kids with the Love of Jesus by Elyse Fitzpatrick & Jessica Thompson. It sums up this topic perfectly:

  

“This is faith. In the same way that you trust in him [God] and not in yourself for your salvation, you can trust in him for the salvation of your children.  You can give yourself grace: he’s in control, he is loving, his plan is best.  And you can give your children grace, too.  Parenting with grace isn’t another set of rules for you to follow.  It’s a story that you’re to rejoice in.  Share the story with your children.  Show them the Savior.  Show them Jesus. Dazzle them with his love.”

We are nothing without him.  He is everything to us. Let’s make sure that we don’t just receive God’s amazing grace in our lives, but we also pass that grace on to our precious little kiddos. 

Until next time rest on this scripture:

But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness. Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.”

2 Corinthians 12:9

Good Morning and Good Night!

Her: Troy and I set a goal of blogging three times a week.   Lately, life has gotten in the way of documenting life so we resolved to wake up this morning at 6:30 a.m. to produce something creative and exciting for all of you.   Last night after settling into bed about 11:00 p.m., I heard my first feverish kiddo crying in her room.   I got up, gave her medicine and a glass of chocolate milk, then I tucked her in and headed back to bed.   5:00 a.m. rolled around and the next child wandered feverishly into our bed.  5:25 a.m. - she throws up in our bed.   5:30 a.m. - next child woke up from the sound of the bath delirious and needing encouragement to get back to sleep.   5:45 a.m.  - coffee brewing, oatmeal cooking and day begins.  6:25 a.m. – Baby drinks off feverish sister’s sippy cup.  7:30 a.m. - biggest sister gives baby sister a bite off her spoon.   I think you can see where the rest of our week is going!

Just when we were feeling too busy we got a sick kiddo curve ball.  So I figured today I would share a scripture that has been rattling around in my brain all week:

But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.   
2 Corinthians 12:9

Today I feel weak and overwhelmed.  But I am letting that all go. This day will be barren of checklist items completed but I will rest in the Lord. So good morning and good night. 

Hypocrite or Human

Her: Looking at our life in our adorable 5 little monkeys photos we may appear put together. Troy is notorious for cuddling me and the kids so at times we look like the syrupy, cuddling family with five adorable girls who obey perfectly. But this is not reality.

Troy and I are no strangers to conflict, with each other, the kids, family, friends, you name it. At times (or most of the time depending on the month) we feel lost and hopeless. We are not "good people". We struggle in our marriage and our kids do really naughty things like cut the babysitter's hair when she's not looking (the 4th kiddo in case you were curious). Worse than that we continue to sin, sometimes perpetually, and definitely often. Our sin grates on the nerves of those closest to us and sometimes those who have distanced themselves as well. We are humbled by our sinfulness daily but desire to look more like Christ. The good news is: We have an amazing God. A God who upholds us, sanctifies us, and loves us unconditionally. That is the God we are trying to serve. Thanks to His grace some days are good but most days are wrought with thoughts of "me" and "mine" and "I want" and "I have to have" and that's just Troy and I, not the kids!

In our continuous struggle toward godliness, God has given us tools which have sustained us, tools that we would be fruitless without. We desire to pass along those tools to anyone who will listen; because without them, we don't know where we would be . . . not anywhere good that's for sure! Troy and I are still on a path of growth (sometimes one step forward and two steps back). We haven't peaked, NOT EVEN CLOSE. We are excited for the journey God has us on. We are excited about learning more about Him. As we learn more we will share more.

We know that the wake of our sinfulness has splashed in the direction of those around us, some have been sprinkled and some have been drenched. To all of you, we're sorry. Please be patient with us as we navigate our way. Please walk with us as we grow together.

My Most Recent Revelation

Her:  In my marriage, like most marriages, we have our ups and downs. Sometimes we function like a well oiled machine and sometimes it's like the engine ceased up with no fix in sight. Being married now for 11+ years I know that we will eventually be back in motion but, in the moment, that's not enough to comfort me. I am overwhelmed with grief and scramble for answers.

I like to work. It is one of my most valuable traits. I hope that lazy will NEVER define me. In a disagreement I also want to work, hence the phrase "work it out", right? I think and talk and try to convince and try to understand, not resting until I have reached resolution (with my husband at least, with everyone else I am a "runner" but that's a topic for another day). This is all fine and well, successful at times, downright annoying for my husband at other times. But none of this actually has anything to do with my revelation.

What I realized that I am missing in those moments or hours, days or weeks is . . . just being nice. So, I may be right and my hubby may be wrong or vice versa (rarely, but it does happen… sometimesJ). But, does it really matter if I am right? Maybe I have asked my husband to do something a number of times. He has agreed he will do it but never actually does. When do I get to be rude and snap at him? Never. And, that's it. Pretty simple but has escaped my knowledge bank until our last engine ceasing moment. Sorry hubby!

Ephesians 4:26a – "In your anger do not sin"

How to Ruin a Morning

Her:  Decide that everyone is trying to torture you and ruin your life.  Then yell at everyone in your path . . . Now your day is ruined and so is everyone else’s plus you’re heart races for a really long time from the adrenaline of being psycho.

How to start your day right.

Pray. Read the Word. Think, “Maybe somebody has a logical reason for doing the thing that is annoying you so badly”.  Get over yourself.

Gonna try my own advice tomorrow.