Why Balance?

Her:  We came up with the name, The Balancing Act, because, to us, that's what life is. There is no way to do life perfectly. It's impossible. We know. We've tried it! Troy and I are both perfectionists in our own ways. We can be hard on ourselves, hard on each other, and hard on everyone else. Our plan for life: Get married, finish college, have kids, be successful, get rich and do everything perfectly. Oh, and in that sentence successful and rich are synonymous. Anyone with me?


There are just a few problems with that scenario.

1. I am not the center of the universe and neither is Troy.
   
   Which of us is going to define perfect? Big Problem! We discovered VERY quickly that perfect to Troy does not look like perfect to Allison and vice versa.
   

• First epiphany: If you are always filtering life through your personal filter, never seeing the journey through another perspective you are bound to experience conflict and a lot of it!
  

1. The grass is not always greener on the other side of the fence.
   
   Darn! This was a bummer to discover. If I just had a house like so-n-so, a paycheck like so-n-so, a car, a husband . . . kids like so-n-so, etc. The list is endless!
   

• Second epiphany: If you spend your life comparing yourself to everyone else you will never measure up. So give up now. Enjoy the journey you are on.
  

1. A peaceful and joyous home is not built with stuff; it's built with love and relationships. When you spend your life collecting stuff you lose time to have relationships with others.
   
   Decorating, crafting, organizing, baking, having "me" time, shopping, climbing the ladder at work, etc. are all good things, but will not alone bring the peace and joy you are looking for. When you're confident that everyone around you thinks that you've arrived, then you will focus on your family. But whose opinion really matters?
   

• Third epiphany: Don't look the part, be the part!
  

1. On those things that really do matter, procrastinating does not get you where you want to be.
   
   Everyone procrastinates. I am a pro at it! An hour here or a day there and not much suffers. But what about procrastinating on relationships? I'll pay attention to my kids tomorrow, I will work on my marriage tomorrow, I will make a difference tomorrow? And, if tomorrow never comes?
   

• Fourth epiphany: Do what matters and do it now!
  

So, what is balance? It's not obsessing, demanding, comparing, measuring up, and perfecting. It's loving, considering, growing and journeying together. So balance what matters and let go of the rest!