Parenting: Part 1

Her: When our oldest child was a baby she was perfect, except that we had to change her diaper, seriously perfect! She was on a schedule, she slept through the night at two weeks (other than illness or teething), did great in restaurants, traveled well, didn't spit up, you name it. We were parenting pros! Or so we thought. We couldn't wait to have another baby so we got pregnant again when our oldest was 16 months. We were thrilled! And then it happened. Our oldest started this weird throwing a tantrum thing. You know that thing naughty children do. But I didn't have a naughty child. I had a good child because I was a good parent. And if she WAS a naughty child then, dare I say it, I was a bad parent. Uh, oh! This could be a problem.

So I went on a journey to fix this problem. Bad child = bad parent and good child = good parent so I must make my child good. And so I bribed, I cried, I pleaded, I begged, I screamed, and I yelled. But nothing made her good. Oh, and I failed to mention that we had our 2nd child and she had tummy trouble so she cried most of the first 8 months of her life. No schedule for her. It was brutal.

So in our house we had an angry two year old, an angry baby and definitely an angry mommy. Welcome home hubby! Desperate for answers we sought counsel from family, friends, elders, pastors, etc. Out of that came parenting lesson number 1: Parenting starts with you. It starts with your relationship with God. You will never be the parent you want to be without fixing your own sin. Your own sin stands in the way of your relationship with your children, how you guide them and what example you set for them.

What does this look like? If you yell at your kids they will meet you toe to toe. If you are inconsistent they will sniff you out in a heartbeat and pounce. If you're a complainer they will complain. If you are negative they will be negative. They are a reflection of you good or bad. Children are little beautiful beings desperate for protection, love, correction when needed, and direction. They are God's gift to you. Parent them accordingly.